Competeing with the "others"
I have been a stay at home mom/house wife for the past 7 years. during this time I haven't felt the need or worry to compete with anyone. Most of my friends are also stay home moms, our roles in life a pretty much the same, we care for our children, husbands, and home. Our commonality actually bonds us together, pushing competition away. So, why am I know finding myself competing now? I'm not competing with my friends, I'm in competition with those I don't know, the "others." I think our roles as moms have lead us to believe that the way we look doesn't matter. I'm a stay at home mom for crying out loud, my job requires me to look "comfortable." I don't have to impress anyone!
It recently hit me, I do need to impress someone... my husband. This whole time I'm thinking my husband loves me, he doesn't care if I look don't look my best. Reality is, no he does care how I look. And who are the "others?" The other women out in the work place. My husband spends over 8 hours a day at his office interacting with professional women who are looking their best and have impressive resumes. I chose to give up being one of those professionals to raise my children, because for me it was more important than having a corner office with a great view.
I have been reading another one of Stormy Omertan's books, The Power of the Praying Wife. In an early chapter she talks about our God given roles as wives. One of those roles involves us taking the time to look our best. It doesn't matter what we do in life, one of our priorities is to look our best and give our best to our husbands. I thought, what!?!?! You have to be kidding me, I take care of my kids, the home, and my husband, and I have to walk around looking like one of the Desperate House Wives? I found myself yelling at Stormy, but she was right. If we don't take care of ourselves and look our best, our husbands may forget the woman they fell in love with.
I know it sounds superficial, but lets be honest, they weren't initially attracted to us because of our personality or intelligence, that was discovered later. So, if they courted you because of your looks, what makes you think another pretty girl isn't going to perk his interest. Another point Stormy touched on was giving your husband the attention and significance he seeks and needs. Again, if he doesn't get it from you, he's most likely going to get it from the "others." So as hard as it is, especially being pregnant, to get dolled up and look my best, I have to do it for my husband, because I love him. In doing things for others, with love, we in turn make ourselves happy.